arrrghh!

I can't sleep. I've been laying in bed with my mind whirling with bits of conversations that haven't happened yet. Does anyone else do that? Plan what you're going to say in an argument that you think is going to happen or a discussion, or just a conversation, sometimes days before it actually happens? It makes no odds anyway, when it comes to the crunch I always forget what I planned to say and I stumble over my words and end up saying the wrong thing and upsetting someone.
Anyway, thats it really, been playing over things I want to say to Pete that will probably not get said properly. You can guarantee that if I do try and say them it will make things a hundred times worse. I'm paranoid about stuff too, wondering what he's doingwhile he's away, but not wanting to text him because he's still angry and upset (I guess) and I don't want to make it worse. But then if I don't text him, he might think I don't give a toss that he's not here and that I've upset him, and then he'll hate me even more. Heh, I thought maybe doing a bit of blogging would help, but it's not really. Writing all this stuff down is just making me worry more.
It's wednesday anyway, he will be back at the weekend and then one way or the other maybe we can get this sorted out.
The silent conversations haven't stopped tho.