and the point is...?

Sometimes I wonder what I'm here for. I do a shit job, which I don't seem to be in any danger of escaping from just yet, I'm a drain on the NHS (I mean come on...24 1/2 years on free medication (so far) - I must be costing them millions not to mention hospital appointments, blood tests and the odd occasion I've ended up in hospital through low blood sugars), I'm mainly grumpy, miserable and maudlin, and the odd occasion I am happy it doesn't last long enough to be any use to anyone. I have a degree for fucks sake, but I wasn't even good enough at that to go on and do what I wanted to do. Biggest waste of time and money I've ever done. The crappy office job that I might have got had I left school with just my GCSEs is looking more and more attractive by the day. I'm 26, good for nothing, falling apart at the seams, and full of self pity that I don't deserve. Hell I've been in relationship for two years and I can't even cheer my boyfriend up when he's down. How shit am I?